Britannia High Q & A
by oatniel
Summary: An interview with six BH students and their dinner girl friend. Submit questions - I'll ask them! :
1. Rules!

**Britannia High Q&A...**

**Betsy - Tyler: Okay - This is the first of a series of interviews I'll be writing, so you should feel honored!**

**Jez: Who is this small person?**

**Betsy - Tyler: Jez! Shut up! I, the Great B.T, am your interviewer - So button it! Oh, and FYI, I'm actually very tall for my age! **

**Claudine: Which is?**

**Betsy - Tyler: Hey! I ask questions, you answer them! Ronnie - Would you the disclaimer for me?**

**Ronnie: The Great B.T doesn't own any of the characters in the story, they all belong to ITV1. Thank you!**

**Betsy - Tyler: Thanks Ronnie! Now - I have a few rules...**

Rule one: No questions are to be put to Georgina Hagen, Matthew Thomas, Mitch Hewer, Sapphire Elia, Rana Roy, Marquelle Ward or Sophie Powels - Oh, and you aren't allowed to put questions to Holly Barton, Sophie's Emmerdale character.

Rule two: No questions are to be put to me.

Rule three: No swearing! I'm an innocent young girl who has never sworn in her life - If you do swear, I'll replace it with a stupid word like 'Fuzzy Wuzzy' or 'Pippin' and delete the review from the list.

Rule four: Have fun, and feed the rabbits - You'll find them in the hutch marked 'Scary Animals'. Try to avoid touching the big one with two buck teeth and a quiff, he's evil!

**Now hit that button and ask some questions! **


	2. KonixuLia

**Britannia High Q and A...**

_Betsy - Tyler sighs as she opens the envolopes containing the next two questions from her 'best mate' KonixuLia._

Betsy - Tyler: Okay - Who let the crazy girl with a bad taste in TV shows ask questions?

KonixuLia: You did! You said I could! Remember? Period five. English. You told me that -

Betsy - Tyler: Who let you in!?

KonixuLia: Just ask them!

Betsy - Tyler: Okay, Okay! Here we go! This ones for all of you! _Why does BH suck so much?_

Ronnie: 'Cuz they didn't put me in the school show!

Betsy - Tyler: I have to agree! I thought your rendition of 'Sweet About Me' was better than Lauren's!

Ronnie: Thanks!

Claudine: Huh? I never liked Miss. Turnblad over there but at least she can sing! Where as Ronnie, erm, let's just say that the whole make up course thing was a good idea!

Ronnie: You're just jealous because you can't sing, bake a victoria sponge AND do Lauren's make up at the same time!

Betsy - Tyler: Hey! Break it up, guys! Okay, the next one is _Why does the great - _Hang on! Didn't you read the rules, KL? I said you can't put questions to me!

KonixuLia: Er - Technically, I'm asking them. Otherwise, It'd say 'Why do YOU...', not 'Why does The Great BT have conversations with fictional characters?' Okay!

Jez: I'll answer that one! Camera on me please?

_Evil rabbit with buck teeth and quiff points a large camera at Jez. Jez stares into it._

Jez: Thanks! Basically, Guys, Betsy - Tyler is what those of us in the business call 'A guitar short of a rock band'...

Evil Rabbit With Buckteeth: What?

Jez: Crackers, Crazy, Cuckoo...

Betsy - Tyler: Thank you Jeremy! And thank you Evil Rabbit With... Erm, how would you feel if I just call you Colonel Teeth?

Rabbit: What about Captain Teeth?

Betsy - Tyler: Fine then! That's it for this chapter then. Thanks KonixuLia for your _help. _And we'll be taking more questions in the ne -

Jez: One second! Is Tyler your second name? Or your middle name?

Betsy - Tyler: Tyler is my middle name that I have turned into a part of my first name, cuz I think it sounds cool.

Jez: Oh right - It's just that I think Tyler is the best surname in the world! It's my name!

Betsy - Tyler: Right - Anyway, get those questions in! See you next time!

Captain Teeth: Yeah! Wuv you, viewers!

_Captain Teeth blows kiss..._


	3. JennyShadeSlayer

**Oh my god - It's been a while! Still, we're back, and more random than ever! So - JennyShadeSlayer - This is your chapter!!!**

**JennyShadeSlayer**

_Everyone gasps as Captain Teeth pulls the next set of questions from a golden envelope_

Captain Teeth: Oh brilliant!!!

Everyone: What!?

Captain Teeth: Can I read them in a different order, please?

Betsy - Tyler: Go right ahead!

Captain Teeth: Okay - Claudine - Why do you have to be so mean?

Everybody but Claudine: Ooooooh!

Claudine: Me? I'm lovely babes!

Ronnie: You wish! But I guess you're just so wrapped up in your own life that you don't give a damn about anyone else. Oh, and Jez? Your haircut is SO gay!!!

Lauren: Wow, Ronnie - What's with all the out - of - characterness?

Ronnie: Oh, but I'm not Ronnie...

_She pulls off her Ronnie Fancy Dress costume, revealing herself to be Holly Barton from Emmerdale, Also played by Sophie Powles._

Ronnie: ...I'm Holly Barton from Emmerdale, Also played by Sophie Powles!

_Told you so._

Betsy - Tyler: You can't talk!!!

_Fine. It 'aint my fault your a *Fuzzy Wuzzy Pippin*_

BB: No swearing, Man!

Holly: Hello!?

Jez: Oh yeah - How did you switch places with her?

Holly: It weren't hard! The not - so - great B.T hasn't bothered with this story for two weeks - Leaving me a fortnight to change places!

_Everyone gives Betsy - Tyler a dirty look._

Betsy - Tyler: It isn't my fault nobody reviewed!

Holly: Anyway - The deed is done! Ronnie is locked in the janitor's cupboard - Making me Sophie Powles most famous character! Mwah ha ha ha ha!!!!

_She jumps out the window._

Jez: Ronnie is locked in the Janitor's cupboard!? I will save her!

_He puts on a knights helmet, and rides off on a large white horse_

Jez: I'm coming, my love!!!

BB: I think what he means is ne-

Lola: Next question!!!

Captain Teeth: Right! Claudine - What did you do for your audition?

Claudine: You really wanna know? Okay! Hit the music!

_She jumps onto a stage that seems to have appeared out of nowhere. _

Claudine: 1, 2, a 1234 - Itseems these days, that all you see is violence in movies and sex on TV - But where are those good old fashoined vales on which we used to rely? Sing along!

Everyone: Lucky there's a family guy! Lucky there's a man who, positivley can do all the things that make us...

Danny: Laugh and Cryyyyy!

Claudine: He's. A. Family Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuyyyyy! Yeah!!!

Betsy - Tyler: You actually sang that?

Claudine: No. But I thought it would be a good idea to sing something heart - warming after the question about my 'mean' personality. I actually sang my own personal song. Want me to sing it?

Everyone: No.

Holly: That figures.

Claudine: Are you still here!?

_She jumps back out the window._

Claudine: I know it'll all bore us to death - But you wanna know what Darren did?

Captain Teeth: Who?

_**Flashback to Episode Two - Behind The Mask - At the elections...**_

Darren:

_People do not understand our love shines so brightlyyy!_

_Oh - So brightly! _

_Our love shines brightly throoooooooooough!_

Jez:

Er, thank you Darren for that number from your working progress -

'Ant and Dec - The musical'!

_**Back to normal....**_

Everyone: Oh yeah...

Betsy - Tyler: So what did he sing?

_She points to Darren, who is on the stage, in a tuxedo and rappers cap, with a huge gold necklace that says 'D' on it._

Darren: Oh yes, Oh yes - Gentleman D is in da house! Oh yes, Oh yes - So gettup on the dancefloor and sing this song! So gettup on the dancefloor - Party all night long! Put some party clothes on tonight, cuz' I'm the rapper who's hip, but polite!

Your sitting in the house and it's a bore, it 'aint gotta be like that anymore, put your dance shoes on and give us a twirl - Tonight I'm gunna ROCK YOUR WORLD! Oh yes, Oh yes! So gettup on the dancefloor, and -

Betsy - Tyler: Thank you, Darren!

Darren: You haven't heard the second verse yet!

Betsy - Tyler: I don't have to, I just know it will, erm, top the charts...

Darren: Aah - I'll die happy now.

Betsy - Tyler: Go ahead - Just do it elswhere! Next!!!

Captain Teeth: Oh - Some for Lauren. What's it like in New Forest? And where is it, anyway?

Lauren: In New Forest? Oh, We all sit under the burnt orange sky, where the main part of the city is enclosed in a giant glass dome. Wild animals roam free, at peace with all humans. There isn't a bad word I could say about anyone. Everyone is so nice. There's no crime. No hatred. Just love and happiness...Aah - New forest...Home.

Captain Teeth: Oooookay...

Claudine: So where is it?

Lauren: New Forest? Aaah - New forest. We all sit under the burnt orange sky, where-

Danny: Erm - Ask her the next one?

Captain Teeth: If you had to audition, what would you have done?

Lauren: Aah - There's a little song we sing in New Forest - Aaah - New Forest... We all sit under the burnt orange sky, where the-

Betsy - Tyler: JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION, SKIPPY!!!

Lauren: It goes like this -

_The instrumental version of 'I know where I've been' from Hairspray! plays..._

Lauren: There's a plaaaaaace, called New Foreeeest, where the skiiiiiies are burnt as the suuuuuun...

Captain Teeth: Right. So, erm, don't forget to ask us questions. We'll leave you with, well, Lauren and her song about New Forest.

Lauren: There's a dreeeeeeeeeeam, That I dream ooooooooof! There's a soooooooooong, that I must sing! But the loooooove, will be manyyyyyy - Worth the hate - Yes, the hate - That we feeeeeeeeel....

Lola: I thought there was no hate in New Forest...

**Well, that's it for now folks. Hope it was worth the wait! I haven't got many reviews on this story, so please tell your FF buddies to all take a look - Ronnie, Danny, BB, Jez and Lola are all sad that nobody asked them questions. Make 'em happy - **

**- Characters In Need - **

**It 'aint hard to do your bit - **

**just click the button below and change a fictional life!**

**:)**


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